St. Louis Family Law: Divorcing a Cheater

Best family law attorney in Saint Louis is Barbara Behrens

The Supreme Court building in Washington DC in warm afternoon light.

LOUIS, Missouri. Discovering that your partner has cheated on you can be one of the most devastating moments in your life. The person you trusted and counted on, betrayed you, and it can be difficult to know what to do next. It can be overwhelming to think about the next steps you’ll need to take, especially if you’re considering divorce, but it’s important to take it one step at a time, and to pace yourself. The Behrens Law Firm, L.L.C. can help you navigate the legal and financial issues that come with divorce. You can visit their website at or call 314-499-6999.  Here are some things to consider:

  1. Keep yourself together. You may feel like you’re falling apart, but it’s important to hold yourself together as you handle these next steps. Avoid drinking or breaking his or her things. If you do file for divorce, any damage you cause can be used against you in court, and you may even have to pay for the damage yourself. Any self-destructive behavior might be brought up in court for child custody determinations, as well, so don’t drink to excess. Finally, whatever you do, don’t get physical. Even a slap in anger can be cast in court as spousal abuse, which can put your custody of your children at risk.
  2. Protect your children. Vent to your therapist, your friends, and your mom, but no matter how old your children are, it can be very emotionally and psychologically destructive to vent to your kids. Furthermore, consider how you’ll talk to your kids about the divorce. While you may not want to work with your spouse on anything right now, this is one place where it may be best if you both could speak to the children as a united team. The Huffington Post reminds parents to be honest, but to avoid sharing every messy and graphic detail.
  3. If the new lover will be part of your ex’s life, try to be civil, if you have kids (but also if you don’t). If you have children, the new lover will most likely be a person in their lives and in yours. This can be very difficult to deal with, but it’s important to think about your children. Courts generally try to preserve the children’s relationships with both parents, and this may include relationships with your partner’s new significant other.
  4. Don’t accept blame for the affair. When people get caught cheating, their initial response may be to make excuses for themselves. Your ex might tell you that “you weren’t meeting their needs.” This can lead to heaps of heartache and may influence how you go about divorcing your ex. Cosmopolitan offers a strong reminder that if he or she was cheating, your partner wasn’t meeting your needs either—but you didn’t cheat. Don’t give up your rights when going through a divorce out of guilt. Emotions run high during a divorce. It is best to get good qualified advice. The law offers important protections to divorcing couples. The Behrens Law Office is a family law firm in St. Louis, Missouri today to protect your finances, your future, your family, and your rights. Visit to learn more.

Leave a Comment